Say Hello, Wave Goodbye, Get Shot In The Back By A Coward

Hello there. This is all very nice, isn’t it?

Or at least, I hope it is because otherwise the last hour of my life has been a complete waste of my time. As opposed to using this blog as a dumping ground for old articles that don’t have a home, I thought it might be a good idea to tell you a bit about me, what I do, who I am, what goes through my head on any given day and, perhaps more importantly, why you should care about that.

I’m not going to lie and say that I’m writing this without the hope that somebody with money will come along and pay me for my services (writing, not sexual… to start off with) but I do feel as though sometimes all I do is slag other people off with no inward focus on myself and all the things that make me fundamentally awful as a human being. If you follow me on Twitter, you might think I give too much away. I apologise for that.

However, it hardly matters. I’m here now with the intention of keeping this blog as up to date with things as I possibly can. I’m sure you’re all pissing your pants with excitement at reading my neurotic, meandering thoughts about the world of ‘freelance writing’, aren’t you? Of course you’re not.

That doesn’t matter now, of course. I’m going to go and look into getting a license to become a Private Investigator. I’m deadly serious. Which, coincidentally, will be my catchphrase. Everyone needs one, right?

I’ve even made a door and everything…